Pride

The story of David and Saul is one of loyalty, friendship, pride, and revenge. David is the hero of the story, while Saul quickly becomes the villain because of his pride. Pride has many forms. As I did my research in the subject of pride I found that C.S. Lewis has some good definitions in his book, "Mere Christianity". I read a book by Dallin Oaks called "Pure in Heart" in which one of his chapters is dedicated to pride. Another source is Ezra Taft Benson's talk "Beware of Pride". There is also the scripture in Proverbs 16:18 which states, "Pride goeth before destruction" and we also read "only by pride cometh contention" in Proverbs 13:10. Pride is elusive in its many forms and many times we do not realise that we have pride until after the fact.

Dallin Oaks separates the types of pride into three categories in his book "Pure in Heart":

1. The Appropriate Pride of Self-Respect

2. The Pride of Self-Satisfaction

3. The Pride of Comparison

The appropriate pride of self-respect has to do with a persons integrity. This is a 'good' form of pride in which those who have it do greater good in the world by acting a part of contributing to society by their actions. A person with this type of pride will take care of their hygiene, stay out of debt, educate themselves to take care of their needs and others needs, and then do an honest days work. This pride has everything to do with self-reliance.

Marion G. Romney said:
“That pride in a man which makes him cherish his own good name and gives him courage to work to sustain it, that pride which makes him shun the bondage of undischargeable obligations, that pride which keeps his head high even in poverty, conscious that he has always been honorable, and has given the best that was in him, that pride I admire. I think, too, it is essential for the preservation of some of the best things within our civilization. Self-respect, self-reliance, and the pride of achievement I look upon as highly prominent factors in our economic welfare, and in our spiritual as well.” (Where is Wisdom?, p. 412.)

The other types of pride are very selfish. Those who have the pride of self-satisfaction do not know it. In fact this pride is very pervasive in the society in which we live and has caused great economic problems. The pride of self-satisfaction causes large banks to fail, stocks to tumble, and housing markets to fall. It is a type of pride that will not care about the welfare of others, but takes everything away from those who have worked hard all their lives for the selfish wants of another's greed. A person who has this type of pride will refuse to be taught because they think they know it all. The person with the pride of self-satisfaction does not do something because they don't like a person in charge. I hear this over and over again with students in the schools. "I won't do the work because I don't like the teacher." The student diminishes their opportunity with this attitude. In fact this type of pride diminishes everyone and their opportunity for growth.

“A person who has the pride of self-satisfaction cannot repent, because he recognizes no shortcomings. He cannot be taught, because he recognizes no master. He cannot be helped, because he recognizes no resource greater than his own. This kind of pride has a self-image that has inflated from the wholesome positive to excessive preoccupied… Preoccupied with self, the pride of self-satisfaction is always accompanied by an aloofness and a withdrawal from concern for others.”

“This is the type of pride Alma meant when he told his son Shiblon: “See that ye are not lifted up unto pride; yea, see that ye do not boast in your own wisdom, nor of your much strength” (Alma 38:11). The consequences of the pride of self-satisfaction in Helaman’s time are described in these words: “And because of this their great wickedness, and their boastings in their own strength, they were left in their own strength; therefore they did not prosper, but were afflicted and smitten, and driven before the Lamanites, until they had lost possession of almost all their lands.” (Helaman 4:13).

"The pride of self-satisfaction is extremely difficult to overcome. As Spencer W. Kimball wrote: “When one becomes conscious of his great humility, he has already lost it. When one begins boasting of his humility, it has already become pride—the antithesis of humility.” (The Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball, p. 233.)–Dallin Oaks, "Pure in Heart"

Another type of pride that Dallin Oaks describes is the pride of comparison. This is an extremely common type of pride because we live in a very competitive world. This type of pride is the seedbed of envy and will bring a person down fast. Saul had this type of pride when he heard the women singing in 1 Samuel 18:7 "And the women answered one another as they played, and said, Saul hath slain his thousands, and David his ten thousands." When Saul heard these words of comparison he became jealous and angry. Ezra Taft Benson said:

“Saul became an enemy to David through pride. He was jealous because the crowds of Israelite women were singing that ‘Saul hath slain his thousands, and David his ten thousands’ (1 Samuel 18:7; see also 1 Samuel 18:6, 8). “The proud stand more in fear of men’s judgment than of God’s judgment. …‘What will men think of me?’ weighs heavier than ‘What will God think of me?’ …“Fear of men’s judgment manifests itself in competition for men’s approval. The proud love ‘the praise of men more than the praise of God’ (John 12:42–43). Our motives for the things we do are where the sin is manifest. Jesus said He did ‘always those things’ that pleased God (John 8:29). Would we not do well to have the pleasing of God as our motive rather than to try to elevate ourselves above our brother and outdo another?

“Some prideful people are not so concerned as to whether their wages meet their needs as they are that their wages are more than someone else’s. Their reward is being a cut above the rest. …  

“When pride has a hold on our hearts, we lose our independence of the world and deliver our freedoms to the bondage of men’s judgment. The world shouts louder than the whisperings of the Holy Ghost. The reasoning of men overrides the revelations of God, and the proud let go of the iron rod” (in Conference Report, Apr. 1989, 4–5; or Ensign, May 1989, 5).

“The pride of comparison is not just a high opinion of one’s own qualities or attainments, or the “inordinate self-esteem” described in the dictionary. It is an attitude that commences with personal comparisons with others and leads to demeaning thoughts or oppressive actions directed at other sons and daughters of God” Dallin Oaks, Pure In Heart, p. 95.

“Pride does not look up to God and care about what is right. It looks sideways to man and argues who is right. Pride is manifest in the spirit of contention” Cleansing the Inner Vessel, Ensign, May 1986, p. 6.

C.S. Lewis wrote: “Pride is essentially competitive…Pride gets no pleasure out of having something, only out of having more if it than the next man…It is the comparison that makes you proud: the pleasure of being above the rest.”

C.S. Lewis called pride the “utmost evil” and “the complete anti-God state of mind,” because this kind of comparison leads men to enmity and oppression and every other kind of evil. This insightful Christian saw that every person should look up to God as “immeasurably superior” to him or her.

Lewis continued: “Unless you know God as that—and, therefore, know yourself as nothing in comparison—you do not know God at all. As long as you are proud you cannot know God. A proud man is always looking down on things and people: and, of course, as long as you are looking down, you cannot see something that is above you. (Mere Christianity, pp 109-11).–Dallin Oaks, Pure in Heart, p. 96.

Saul tried to kill David three times and twice his friends intervened for him. Jonathan and Michal Saul's children were loyal friends to David and saved his life. Another time Saul sent David to battle in the hope that he would be killed and David's life was spared.

The touching promise that David and Jonathan made to each other was a sacred covenant of friendship when they said, "The Lord be between me and thee forever." 1 Samuel 20:23. This shows a deep and abiding love for a friend. There is loyalty, love, and devotion to the other. I wonder what type of friends can we be if we get rid of pride and find the opposite of enmity which is love?

Wandering In And Out

I dozed in and out of consciousness this afternoon, fully intending on making dinner, but did not feel hungry at all. At 4:40 I heard the door slam downstairs and footsteps on the stairs. Kerry was home and the cats were alert and running to see who was at the door. I yelled out, "Is that you Kerry?" Of course he had a smart aleck remark like, "No." I thought that I had a few minutes and dozed off for about an hour. When I woke up Kerry was standing at the bedroom door saying, "Hey, we didn't go out on our date on Friday. How about going to eat and then having FHE? But...if you want to have something here that is okay too." I really didn't care one way or they other so we did as he suggested and went out for Chinese food. I ate maybe half my dinner and got a take out box to go home. I enjoyed the steamed vegetables best. Lunch tomorrow...or some other time.

When we got home we talked about the bird nest in our backyard. Kerry had to go see the three little birds in the nest and one of them flew out of the planter. The parent birds were having a big problem with that and Kerry got a scolding. The little bird hopped around the backyard and then took off for the front. Kerry followed it and found the parents herding the little tweeter to the backyard again. Kerry felt guilty so he opened the gate while they hopped in with their little charge. One little bird survived so far. It is a fun distraction and we enjoy talking about the nature in our backyard. The cats especially enjoy watching the birds out the back window.

Uck! The weird things we might eat.

Have you ever eaten anything so totally dangerous to your health and at the same time discovered you didn't know you were eating it until it was crunching in your teeth? I have. I still think about it and wonder why I ate it.

I remember doing a Youth Conference and the theme was I Dare You. Well they brought out a bunch of earthworms for the kids to eat and I about threw up. My stomach was just churning. To me, eating earthworms is like eating muddy dirt with slugs and slimy bugs in it. I wondered if the kids would get some fatal disease and die right there on the spot from it. Salmonella at the least.

Then it happened to me. I was sitting in a cafeteria eating a bowl of cream of potato soup with ham in it when I crunched down on something that was unusual in a soup. I felt with my tongue something rough and stringy so I pulled it out of my mouth...It was...a...half-eaten...TAPEWORM. SHUDDER. I took it an stuck it to the cafeteria tray and just couldn't believe that I had eaten it. I wonder if cooking it killed it. I wonder in the first place how it got there in my soup. UCK and UCK again.

By the way...if you decide to serve tapeworm soup for dinner...Please don't invite me.

If We Only Knew Who We Are...

My thoughts today are on the ability for us to realise who we really are. The reality of life is this. We are here to be tested and tried to see if we will keep the commandments under the most trying circumstances. Over and over in the Old Testament we read that the Lord is trying his people to see if they will keep the commandments. There are so many times in which we see the children of Israel faltering and even coming out in open rebellion against God. Remembering who we are is critical to our progress in this life. We have to think of ourselves as eternal beings first. I am a daughter of my Heavenly Father. That tells me that I have the ability to become greater than I am today. Because I have eternal royal heritage, I am loved by an eternal being who desires that I be happy. There is an opposite being who does exist and he desires that I become miserable. I am subject to temptation and trial in this life by that wicked being who hates me, hates Jesus Christ, hates the plan of salvation, and hates everything to do with this wonderful body that I have been given because he can't have one. I exist on this earth because I have made righteous choices in that pre-earth life to follow my Savior Jesus Christ. Everyone who is here made righteous choices to follow the Savior. Everyone.

The war continues today and many fall who do not remember and are not conscious of who they really are. They have forgotten. We often forget and are asked to remember every week the many blessings that we have been given when we take the Sacrament. Life sometimes gets in the way and distracts us. We are pulled this way and that when we don't listen to the prophets. Remembering requires that we forget all the little scrapes and bruises that we get in life and focus our lives on the Savior. It is tough to remember who we are if we are apt to become offended by others actions in our pride and a miriad of other sins that help us forget the eternal nature of our beings. The goal is to have charity. Charity is that god-like love that will make us into the people that God requires us to become.

We are constantly in a battle with the Natural Man. It is part of our nature but we can rise above the Natural Man and become more spiritually minded if we try. This is my belief lately that as I watch my thoughts and my actions that I can become more of a saint and therefore look farther ahead towards being a loving being like my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. The trial of Faith begins with the thought. The thought becomes the action and the action becomes a habit. Jesus said, "As a man thinketh, so is he". This statement has profound meaning to me and I find that controlling the thought is the best way to begin to overcome the Natural Man and become the Saint that I want to be.

Samuel, Eli, Children, and Jesus Christ

When I started reading I Samuel I was impressed by the desire that the women had in the Old Testament to become mothers. Culturally speaking in that time to not be a mother was a terrible thing. I believe that the value of children would have been enhanced by the mortality rate among the young. Imagine losing a large majority of the children before they could reach the age of 5 years old. It must have been a tremendous blessing to have children grow up. When I read about Hannah and her desire to have children I could remember my longing to become a mother. Although pregnancy is tough, when the children come it is the greatest blessing on earth. I loved being a new mom and loving those little ones. They depended on me for everything. Getting up in the middle of the night, I would cuddle my children and smell their soft baby smell. There was no guide book to being a parent but I know how much a mother loves her children because I love mine. Hannah's longing to have a child is understandable. She would give anything even her own son to have the ability to bear children. What an act of charity when she gave Samuel to Eli to raise.

Eli, I think also loved his sons, but I think his story shows what happens when children refuse to listen to a parent's good advice. Eli's sons had no respect for God and the office to which they had been born. It was really sad that they used their office to lead the children of Israel astray. Then when their father rebuked them, they did not listen. Sadly they died because of their wickedness. If they had only listened and given respect and honor to God for the blessings that they had been given...

Samuel had a similar thing happen to him. His sons were judges and they took bribes instead of being righteous judges. Because of this the children of Israel did not want to live under the rule of judges anymore and asked Samuel for a King. Samuel probably was heartbroken over the wickedness of his sons. He told the people that they would be in bondage if they had a King. Nevertheless, Samuel obeyed the voice of the people because the Lord told him to. Samuel honored the Lord and felt rejected by the people, but the Lord told Samuel that they had rejected the Lord. The Lord's own people would repeat this rejection when he came to earth to obtain an mortal body and atone for our sins.

This brings to mind how important it is to keep the commandment to honor father and mother. This requires that a person live a righteous life to honor not only their earthly father and mother but the Heavenly Father and Mother also. Keeping the commandments brings your parents joy.

This past week I have been pondering about the last day of Jesus life when he suffered so much. I thought about him going before the Sanhedrin, Pilate, and Herod. Then I thought about how he was mocked, beaten, and at last rejected by his own people. He was king and had the demeanor of a king. The children of Israel rejected him and then he carried his cross up to Calvary until he could carry it no more. He fell and cut his knee open on the stones and then someone was asked to carry the cross for him. He was hung on a rough cut tree with his hands, wrists, ankles, and feet nail to the cross. For three hours his friends, and mother stood by him until he died. Then they took him, wrapped his body, and laid him in a borrowed tomb. There he remained for 3 days until the day he took his body up again and was resurrected. He conquered death and fulfilled his mission on earth. Because of that we are saved. We can return to our Heavenly Father and be with them in heaven. But we have to do our part. We have to watch ourselves and our actions. I can say that he lives. He atoned for our sins and is with the Father in heaven. He directs and guides his church. He loves us. He knows us. And He understands us. The prophet Isaiah described him perfectly, "Wonderful, Counselor, The Mighty God, The Everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace." I believe in Christ. This is my testimony. In His name. Amen.